The Journey Inward

Ah, introspection; the journey inward. A quest whose ending promises the fountain of youth, but whose path is beset with terrors and misery beyond imagining. While on my own journey inward, I’ve always been amused and confused by the fact that even in the privacy of my own thoughts, free from the judgments of anyone else, I am sometimes too scared to be honest with myself. What makes that even more frustrating, is that the truth that I am trying to face is actually hidden from myself, within myself. Explain that one, right?

What is Introspection?

So, maybe you’ve never really been introduced to the concept of introspection. Well, allow me the honor! Introspection is the art of looking inward and observing your own thoughts, emotions, desires, and intentions and understanding why they are there, without judging what you find. It is the art of knowing yourself, and being comfortable alone in your own company. In my opinion, this is one of the greatest skills to develop. Unfortunately, it is also one of the more difficult skills to develop, because of the amount of patience and humility it requires.

Why be introspective?

Why might you want to learn to master introspection? First and foremost, introspection is how you build a healthy, honest relationship with yourself. Your relationship with yourself is the foundation upon which you must build the rest of your life! Everything depends upon it. So many people have horrible relationships with themselves. People hate themselves, fear themselves, or don’t even have a clue who they really are. Introspection is how you fix that, get to know yourself for who you really are, and learn to love and accept that person.

As you get to know yourself better, you also become more familiar with the inner workings of everyone else. It might come as a bit of a surprise, but as different as everyone is from everyone else, they are also incredibly similar; maybe more similar than they are different. As you begin to understand why you do and say certain things, or how and why something makes you feel a certain way, you will find yourself able to predict and understand the reactions of other people as well. This can be used to help people or hurt them, and that is ultimately up to you.

Another great reason to be introspective is that self knowledge leads to self mastery. Instead of running on auto pilot and reacting automatically to your world, you can choose your reactions. For instance, even though you just got cut off in traffic, and it truly was the other guys fault and you have every reason to be angry, you don’t need to be. It is now just an event that you can observe almost from a third person perspective, and choose how you react to it.

Take Responsibility

Being yelled at by your wife, husband, boss or parents is now just an event, and you alone are the one in charge of how you respond to it. Now, the drawback here is that if you are the type of person who uses their circumstances as an excuse for bad behavior, you no longer have that leg to stand on, and you become completely responsible for all of your actions, thoughts and feelings. That’s where the humility comes in.

Self mastery through introspection can make an incredible impact on your relationships too. As you learn about yourself you will start to see your bad behaviors, nasty habits, and selfish ways more clearly. A blessing and a curse to be sure, because as painful and unpleasant as it is to be faced with those aspects of yourself, it also gives you the opportunity to change and become better, and right wrongs that have been done. That’s where the patience comes in, because you will fail over and over again on your way. Don’t give up! Failure is not the end, it is only one more milepost on the road to where you want to be.

Be mindful

Getting to know yourself well, and not judging yourself are two different things. That is why I highly recommend a guide to help you through this process. Having a trusted friend who you can be open and vulnerable with, who will be honest with you, and can see you from an unbiased perspective will help tremendously. It is important not to get lost in your dark side and become despairing. A good thing to do is be mindful and to take a step back; just observe yourself, your emotions, and thoughts. And accept everything you see. No matter how vile it is, it is neither good nor bad, just information. Your job, once you see it, is to find out why it’s there, not attack yourself over it.

Now that you know a little about introspection, what it can do for you, and some of what to watch out for, how to begin?

Tips and Tricks

• Begin a mindfulness meditation practice. Taming the “monkey mind” is exceptionally helpful when it comes to observing without judging. The “monkey mind” is a Chinese phrase that refers to the restless, overexcited mind whose thoughts keep coming unbidden and uncontrollable.
• Pay close attention when you react strongly to something either positively or negatively, and get used to asking yourself why you’re initial reaction is whatever it is.
• Start journaling. Writing down your feelings and thoughts about events that happened throughout the day and exploring your reactions is very revealing and helpful. Chase the “why”. Something happens and you feel happy. Why? Because of “a”. Why does “a” cause that feeling? Keep up this self interrogation until it bottoms out. You can also use this to examine the past and glean insights from events that are already come and gone. It can be a bit harder, but it also is great practice in learning to master your emotions.
• Start taking responsibility for your emotions and responses to things. Really come to grips with the fact that you are completely, one hundred percent in control of your reactions, and that nothing and no one can make you feel or respond a certain way.

As a Man Thinketh

A book that I read that I highly recommend to everyone is called “As a Man Thinketh” by James Allen. It’s one of the few books that I have read multiple times. It focuses on your thoughts and how they shape your life. Excellent for anyone looking to get started on their introspection journey.

You got this!

Do not fear your inner self! They alone hold the keys to freedom and happiness for you. It is time to dig deep and get to “know thyself”, so that you can become the fullest version of you. Get on it!